Consent

Sometimes, you’re trundling along through the digital forest, trying to navigate terms of service longer than Dostoevsky’s back catalogue, when suddenly… there’s a Larch. Unexpected. Tall. Mildly majestic. And utterly irrelevant to the rest of what’s about to happen. The Google fonts fiasco: Helvetica, but make it litigious In a plot twist worthy of Kafka, a German court (Landgericht München, civil chamber number three, for those playing Regulation Bingo at home) ruled that simply including a Google-hosted font on your website amounts to illegally handing over users’ IP addresses to Google. No consent. No justification. No shady disclaimer hidden in 6pt grey-on-grey legalese. ...

Let’s talk about the time the United Nations—guardian of international human rights, global peacekeeper, moral compass for the post-war world—shared biometric data of Rohingya refugees with the government they were fleeing from. Yes, you read that right. Without informed consent. The very people who fled genocidal violence in Myanmar, who put their trust in the UN for protection, were quietly catalogued and handed back—data-first—under the noble banner of “registration”. Cue the press statement: “Statement on refugee registration and data collection in Bangladesh.” It reads like a lesson in passive voice and bureaucratic shoulder-shrugging. There’s talk of “ensuring safeguards” and “technical protocols” and “cooperation with the host government”. What’s not mentioned: how collecting biometric data without proper, informed consent, then sharing it with the regime accused of ethnic cleansing, might be—how do we put this gently—a catastrophic breach of trust and human rights. ...

There’s a certain charm to grey areas. They’re neither here nor there—like a politician’s promise or a cookie consent banner. Let’s have a wander through three choice examples of how law, tech, and coercion intersect in a fog of plausible deniability. We’ll start where the term “consent” first gained cultural weight—sexual consent—and then follow its cheerful migration into digital life, courtesy of everyone’s favourite data vampires. 1. Sexual consent: A legal fiction? Let’s be honest. “Sexual consent” exists mostly as a legal construct. It’s the tidy phrase we reach for when courts, lawyers, and HR departments need to put human messiness into bullet points. ...